Things Not To Ask A Lesbian…..

This is a post to clear up some regular questions in hopes that I don’t have to hear them again and again…

1)Are you two sisters?… NO! She is not my sister, she is my forever person, we hold hands and cuddle on the street, i’m not convinced you should be doing that with your sister. Also, I don’t like that you’re insinuating I would date someone who looks like me (Although apparently I am).

2) Is it just a phase?….. It means I like girls, especially this one girl. That might make me a lesbian, bisexual or even going through a very extended phase. I don’t come up to you ask about your sexuality.

3) What do you two do.. when…y’know?… When we sit at home watching youtube or marathoning through TV shows? oh no, you’re asking me how we have sex. Are you SERIOUS? It is of absolutely none of your concern how I sleep with my fiancee. If you’re that interested go and watch some porn but leave me out of it.

4) Will you have a threesome with me? (this classic normally comes from a sleazy straight man in a club)… Nope. We are very much only interested in each other and do not need to add another person to that. Especially not some sweaty creep in a club. Thanks.

5) Is your life like the L Word? Yes, I have a large group of mostly lesbian friends but we all work (Unlike the l word) and surprisingly, hardly any of us have slept with each other.

6) Are you a lesbian because you hate men? What part of being in love with a woman means that I had a tragic history with a man. I’m with another female because i’m in love with her and no other explanation is necessary.

7) But you’re too pretty to be gay? This one really makes me want to punch someone in the face. What has my physical appearance got to do with who i’m attracted to? You don’t say someone’s to ugly to be straight, I just happen to have long blonde hair who likes to wear dresses.

8) I could turn you. (Again,normally in a bar). Nope, I don’t think you can. In fact, if anything, you’re probably making me more of a lesbian with you’re creepy comments.

9) Are you going to use a turkey baster when you have kids? Are you? There are so many different ways to have children these days. So many women gay or straight have problems getting pregnant and you’d never ask a straight woman how she’s going to try. But keep sticking to your clichés.

10) Which one of you is the man? One of the best parts about this little situation is that there isn’t a man. If I wanted there to be a man involved I would be with a man. We are both very much women, boobs and everything.

I’m sure i’ll expand on this at some point for now here’s my little rant about lesbian questions!! No doubt i’ll turn this into a vlog soon so stay tuned for that!!

 

 

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